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God Save My Marriage

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  1. Last week
  2. Amen and amen! The Peace is SO important. You get to be you now. You will be able to hear the still small voice of the Holy Spirit so much better now. God bless you!
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  4. Well the last time I posted anything in here was approximately 4 months ago. August 3rd I finally left wolf because I was in fear of my life. October 5th wolf requested divorce and I picked up the papers from his attorneys office. That same week I also obtained my apartment as I was living in a domestic violence shelter prior to. October 22 I gathered up the last bit of my belongings from the house. Wolf again had to show everyone what a big bad wolf he is by huffing and puffing. Again his perception he’s a big bad wolf. October 24 I obtained my attorney (thankfully my brother could help me ou
  5. Wed night, Dan almost drives into the ditch on my side of the car & scared me. I ask him to drive like he cares about me. He said sorry. Then later, i remind him that he needs to get ahold of his employer because they are the ones that are holding up his unemployment(Xmas shutdown). He argues with me about it. I start feeling sick & go to bed. He bothers me all night long in bed wanting sex from me. I say no & that i need my rest. He gets up & goes to work. Later, he says sorry & we go about our day. We listen to your couples call after going to bed also on Thursday. Last n
  6. In reality, it is good that you can share some things and have an outlet here to express your frustration. If these things are accurately being describe then it is crazy land that you continue in the marriage. We really don't have any advice except to ignore him when he is being an a** and go with it m/enjoy it when hes treating you nice. The only way to get a hard stop to this is to divorce him but in the meantime, Just protect yourself by walking away when he is acting badly and enjoy the peace when hes acting good.
  7. **Dan has been cycling with hypersexuality & manic episodes & now he is depressed & taking it out on me- possibly undiagnosed bipolar disorder. We both took the bipolar test but i heard him lie on some questions. His sister-w/bad furnace(who Dan does CBD edibles with) has bipolar disorder. Schizophrenia runs in their family too. Dan refuses to take his anxiety meds so his moods don't fluctuate as much.
  8. Dan is all over the place! After 4 yrs of being together, Dan wants a $4,000 wood insert for the fireplace & now wants to cut wood. Two of the past 3 nights, he loads wood into the fireplace in the middle of the night, lays on the couch, watches a movie via streaming app on our living room TV w/sex scenes in it(the cover of movie has a girl in panties)- I caught him on the 2nd night, not the 1st. He admitted to it & i told him how i didnt wanna be married to a porn addict. He said sorry & I told him that he has needs to guard his thoughts & not lead himself into temptation by l
  9. Just assume that the jewelry is for you for Christmas. Or for the girls. Assume the best until proven otherwise. He is definitely having fun jekyll and hyding you. If you want to go along with him when hes doing the good things and enjoy the benefit of that but then walk away from him when Mr. Hyde comes out, then go ahead and do that. His getting off of the call last night and listening to whatever he was listening to on his headphones would be enough for us to recommend that you just simply have nothing to do with him. But we know that the 2 of you just keep
  10. Dan listened for a half hour on the call last night & then put on his headphones. He was a jerk this morning before work. He called around 8 this morning, said he was sorry & cried about how he thought he was doing something good. I told him that I wanted to be considered. I like a few surprises but not everything to be a surprise. I told him that I wanted a date, days & weeks ago. He said that he wants to go with me to return that stuff today. I said idk if I want to get out & wait in lines in this snow storm. *** I did see on a receipt that he spent $125 on a piece of jewelry
  11. Dan dated himself^^^ tonight. The pizza, that Dan offered to bring home, was ready to pick up at 5:30 & he brought it home around 8pm. We were starved! After slinging what he bought me on the bed, he made sure to tell me how nice he was to buy me presents or else I wouldn't have anything to open under the Xmas tree. He walks away & uses the excuse that he needed to sit down with his daughters(choosing himself). --Dan decided to be gone for almost 5 hours after work. **He said that I(Melissa)can take all my presents back. He bought clothes (I need to try my clothes on be
  12. Weeks ago, Dan spent days looking for a heated jacket that he wanted to buy for me. I never wanted that. It was the gift he wanted for himself. I bought the jacket for him & he told me to cancel it so I canceled it. He decided tonight that he was gonna go Xmas shopping for me. He never asked me what I wanted. Usually, he asks what I want & then he fills in with a few surprises. He called home & I was quiet on the phone & he asked if I was mad. I said no & I explained to him that I was stressed. He got home & slung all my presents out on the bed, punishing me for l
  13. Dan called Joel. Joel returned Dan's call. Dan minimized himself to Joel about abusing me & made it about how I talk about his coworkers(I haven't in months). He spun it around & made it about how I know everything about him & he doesn't know what I'm doing all day. I haven't violated him by porn, lying, cheating, secrets, etc...like he has done to me. For instance: He doesn't tell me when his daughter stays home(sick) from school(school called me & wondered where she was at & i didn't know). He keeps secrets about his daughter driving illegally w/a friend. He manipulates &
  14. About the medication.. just have the doctor or nurses communicate with him rather than you being in the middle.
  15. Yes, for this moment, maybe send him a text message. Dan, perhaps I have not been clear. I will not continue to live this way with you. If you want to have access to me, then you need to call Joel and get direction from him and this time, stick to it. If not, we have nothing to talk about. I will not keep livng in this topsy turvy, Jekyll Hyde world of being abused with threats, anger, porn, secrecy and everything else that you seem to want to have in a marriage relationship. Of course, sending him this text message is your choice. You either end up divorced or end up with him re
  16. Dan has given me the silent treatment since (Sat)yesterday until just a little bit ago. He said come here. I walk into the bedroom & he said should we go after the 1st of the year to file for divorce because we can't keep going on like this. I walked away with blank look on my face. 10 min later, he said come here. I didnt move. A while later, he said it could be so much better if we'd just compromise. I said nothing. He kissed my lips. I turned away. Do I turn away when he tries to kiss me?
  17. You are welcome and we wish that Dan wiuld commit his heart fully to the Lord.
  18. Dan doesnt wanna be transparent with me. I havent had to accuse Dan because the porn filter will let him go where he wants to on the web. It just sends me a red alert when he is on a porn site. Dan told me today himself that he turned his porn filter off. He said he turned it off when I called the cops the other night for hitting me. I called Prosecutor today & left a voicemail. We are in over our heads in debt since coming to the Intensive so I don't know how much I will walk away with in the divorce. I'm sick of the manipulation & abuse & ready to be free!
  19. Dan has divorced in his heart. ( If he said exactly what you said that he said.) At this point I would stop trying to get him to apologize, stop trying to get him to turn his p*** filter on and just move toward divorce. It is time to start proceeding toward making the divorce a legal divorce. Dan has divorced, it is just not finalized illegally. You do not have to move out of the house. Just ignore him as if he does not exist. No arguing. No fighting. Just do what needs to be done to slow but sure get the divorce done legally and get you and Neveah established on your own.
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