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God Save My Marriage

Christfollower

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  1. Thank you for responding. I will try to text you today, Kathy. I'm limited to when I feel safe to text as I know my husband would probably not be very happy. He thinks I'm bringing people into our business and I'm just not up for an argument. He had spouts of a few harsh words last night but it didn't turn into a blowout. He just seems sad, playing on his cell phone. I know it's because he's not happy at home with me. I just feel like satan is out to destroy and I feel like I can't give up on him yet. My prayer has been more of his relationship being restored with God than as much restoring ou
  2. I'm hanging in there. Im so confused. Thursday night was horrible. After my husband discovered I was looking through an old cell phone of his while he wasn't home, he was irate. Calling me shady and underhanded. I admit I have hidden things in the past to make him think such. He went on to tell me he was leaving and we were telling our kids what was "going down." He accused me of telling people our business. I had told his mother that he only plays on his cell phone and I haven't seen him pick up a bible in some time. I tried to explain that it was only out of concern and not as a dig He Ca
  3. Thank you for your encouragement. I just got off the phone with my husband and he basically said that he feels nothing for me and the only reason he hasn't moved out is because of our children. He's tried to put on a happy face and just deal with it but is not happy. He wishes I had changed 12 years ago after my affair. He's angry because I continued to be in my bubble of sweeping things under the carpet and holding onto things grudgingly. He did change a lot. I was too busy licking my wounds to see that. He wants to move out but says he will be the bad guy because he left mommy. I'm so brok
  4. I have found that my life is so similar to that book! But I've not reached the point of being brave enough to ask my husband to read it. He still feels that we both have wronged each other but I am the main reason we are in the state we're in. Because I "checked out" and sank into my own world of pity, he has lost his romantic love for. He's waited for years for me to get involved in our marriage. I can understand his point and he did change for good in a lot of ways. I guess I felt like my husband was never my safe haven. Always on guard of what I would do next to upset him....whether it was
  5. Thank you for taking me under your wing. I'm new to any kind of forum. I feel like I can't talk to just anyone simply because of the damage that can be done through gossip and the poor example it would show to a lost world when a pastor and his wife can't get it together. Thank you so much. You are a blessing.
  6. Thank you for making paragraphs. It does make it much easier to read. I appreciate your compassion. I don't know what will happen. I will try to find the chart you are speaking of and I have got one of their books to start reading. Thank you so much for your advice. I'm holding onto Christ. Tightly.
  7. Thank you for your words of advice. Last night was horrible. We got into a terrible argument about all our issues. We can't seem to understand each other. He doesn't understand how I checked out when all I heard were harsh words and criticisms. He feels like he has been standing in the gap our entire marriage. I don't see it that way. But regardless, I know my God can heal and restore. He has reached a point of too little too late. He's angry that it took him cheating to change my ways. I admit that it has shaken me to the core and made me take a good look at myself. And God has truly done a c
  8. My husband is a pastor. He started in youth ministry for 8 years and became the pastor of our home church 3 1/2 years ago. We have always had an up and down relationship. But theyre's no doubt in my heart that God put us together. I saw God transform him from a very shy teenage boy to a Sunday school teacher, deacon, youth minister to senior pastor. I know he has a calling. It's very evident. But at each step of moving forward in ministry, satan has attacked our marriage fiercely. Over time I had let harsh, hurtful words that were frequent set in my heart and committed adultery. That was 1
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