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God Save My Marriage

Pebbles

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About Pebbles

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  1. Thanks for all the love, ladies. Pure in Heart, as usual, your words have brought me such hope and joy. Thank you for your continued encouragement. You are an inspiring woman and I am blessed to know you. Love to you all. Signing off for a bit...
  2. I am happy to share some wonderful news about what God has done! When God led us to this ministry 11 months ago, my husband and I knew that we would not be able to stay together unless something drastically changed. My husband had been praying for quite some time, "God, make me into the man that You want me to be." Imagine his surprise when Joel shared at the beginning of the intensive that THAT was precisely what God was going to teach those men. Be the man that your wife needs you to be and you will become the man that you are MADE to be. When we left Florida that weekend, my husband wa
  3. I want to remarry my husband just so we can do THIS!! No way... can you imagine sitting through it LIVE? What a way to shake up a wedding ceremony and make it out of the box indeed! Thanks, I needed that laugh. I even got my groove on while I watched it!!
  4. Honestly, as I see it, there is not much more to do than the current plan. I can totally understand why her venting threw you for a loop and you are taking a step back to re-assess the situation, but as Joel said, it's all part of the process. Remember, your wife is wrestling inside. She is in touch with the pain she has been living with... it is no longer hidden under the surface, it is right there bubbling over. This is GOOD. But it is hard for both of you. While she feels this overwhelming pain, she also sees that you ARE changing. I know she does. But I would also be willing to bet that
  5. Ha!! I've been missing all the action... but I am with you all, ladies. I tend to hit a second wind around 10 o'clock. In fact, I don't think I even enter into deep sleep until around 7 in the morning, so if I have to be up by then I feel so deprived. Anyone else relate? (Although I have to admit that I have been forcing myself to go to bed before midnight for the sake of my husband and son who DO wake up around 7, and my body is adjusting. But if I can stay asleep, I DO!) Heartsong, I have been thinking about you a lot. I totally agree with Kimberly. I think Shock needs to work this stuf
  6. I am sorry to hear about your grandma. It makes sense to me that seeing her would cause you to be more in touch with the sadness that you have been living with in your heart. This is a place that you will pass through. Facing the sadness and feeling it is actually a sign of real health. None of us can skip this step. But it is just a step and the more time that passes with your husband loving you, the more the sadness will give way to hope and then joy in its fullest sense will return. It takes time. You are so good at explaining what you are feeling and noticing in your life... I think th
  7. I am delighted to hear such good news. I rejoice with you that your husband is loving you like you deserve to be loved. You're right--he DOES have it in him!
  8. Oh, beautiful one... I am so sorry for the pain you have had to endure. It is heart-breaking. I commend you for sharing your story and for the way you have stood up to your husband and communicated in no uncertain terms that things MUST change or he will no longer be permitted to be in your life. You have done so much work over the years to try to mend something that wasn't your doing at all. I hope and pray that NOW your husband will invest HIMSELF the way you have for so long... and that you will be able to receive the love and healing that your heart needs. No matter what He chooses,
  9. Wow... yes, you did make the situation more painful for her by venting and giving her a laundry list of the things that you did RIGHT that day, but what is important is that you SEE that you did that and you made it right in the end. It's good that what you were left with was a realization of HER pain. It's sooo good that you are allowing your heart to go there. You know what, your wife is probably right, you probably are disconnected. BUT you are finally taking steps now to reconnect with your heart and you are doing this by being there for your wife. You are learning. You can see clearly
  10. Thanks for your comment, Freedog! You are right... she is not at fault here AT ALL. I hope that it didn't sound like I was putting the onus on her. But it's always good to check in and make sure that we wives do our job too. I am glad that you are recognizing that she is giving you encouragement and reproof when appropriate. I am sure that it means a lot to her that you notice this. Bravo, Crystal!!
  11. I always enjoy your updates. They are so specific and honest. I can understand that this is a very frustrating dynamic for you. So what if you "tweak" this a bit? What if you freely offer Freedog compliments when he is doing a good job, but also freely offer him your concerns about his tendency to get off track after hearing them? That way he can see that you recognize that he is taking the right steps to bless you AND that your heart still needs a track record of him being "steady." Does that make sense? It is important for both of you that you offer encouragement to him. It will help
  12. It is good to hear that you are starting to see this process from your wife's perspective. That is where true growth begins. Realize that when you want to give up you are slipping back into the very behavior that got you where you are at: it is you wanting to avoid your responsbility. You don't have to get stuck there. You don't even need to beat yourself up for being tempted (or slipping back into it). You just need to shake it off and tell yourself, "Oh no, there I go again. Time to get back on track. Time to make this about meeting Emily's needs and not running from responsibility." Yo
  13. Looney, I have been thinking about you a lot tonight. I am exasperated for you! I CANNOT understand why 1SM won't do the simple thing set before him... I just can't. I know that you have been told that this is not about YOU. I know that you realize that plenty of people love your company and it is 1SM who is the one who is off, not you. But at the same time, I still wanted to come here and tell you that you are DELIGHTFUL! You are full of life, spunky, energetic, wise, giving, fun, loving, and WONDERFUL! I so wish that 1SM would wake up long enough to allow himself to face what he is l
  14. You and Looney Tunes are in the same boat. All of us in forumland see who you are and we just LOVE you... but the men who are right under your noses just don't seem to get it. And it's baffling. I just hope that in spite of shock's blindness that you are still able to see the treasure that you are. 'Cause you sparkle and shine very clearly from where I sit. (And that goes for you too, Looney Tunes. I know you are amazed at heartsong's patience, but you are NOT unaccustomed to longsuffering over in your world either. YOU amaze me too!)
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