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Oreo can come over anytime. Just give her fair warning - DJ has been cranky lately, and that ball is likely to not only be removed, but buried. ;) Leon will only adjust her attitude if she's bugging him, though, which she probably won't.

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FW,

 

Oh I so agree with you, I would love to read a compilation of her 'stories', which funny enough are NOT really 'stories' but real live/truthful life experiences. Truth is always stranger then fiction, and in this case... funnier!!

 

MJ,

 

I totally agree with you, there is something wrong, even if it is "only" a cry for help in the form of attention. I look back and think some of mine was that cry for attention, because I was being molested and terrorized and they (hear: My Mom) did not want to hear those "things". I did have legitimate things that happened too, but I know that I likely made more out of things because I wanted to be "important" to someone, to have someone care enough about me that I made a difference. NOT sure I am making any sense, but... I know what I am trying to say and the tears I am crying right now are probably good therapy.

 

Looney,

 

Once again, sorry to use your thread, it just seemed like I should answer here what MJ said!! As for what you said, I am trying to get to the point that I know that I am worthy. I AM worthy because Christ died for me; satan has a strong hold there to put me down!! As for my life right now... I KNOW that there is something wrong. I have labs, CAT scans and MRI scans, surgery reports, biopsy results, spinal tap results, and on and on and on, that give evidence that I am NOT making any of this up and it is unfortunately real. I have to be honest here though, I sometimes think that you all can't possibly believe me, it seems that I am coming and asking for prayer for one thing after another. SADLY this is all ever too real!! That reminds me, I should go do an update about what is happening with my latest 'situation'. Thanks for the love and support, all of you!!

 

BLessings,

 

Tigger

 

Tigger

 

Doctors are blind sometimes. Keep going to different doctors until you find a gifted diagnostician. They are out there--one of them saved my life---he could pull information from the air.

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Today has been an aggravating day.

 

We went to the farm auction with Eeyore and HD on Friday and bought 2 muscovy ducks. I like them because they are friendly, calm ducks and they LOVE flies. We had them a few years ago and did not have a fly problem in the barn all summer, which is a good thing since I'm crazily allergic to fly bites. We lost them all a few winters ago when it was frigidly cold and hadn't replaced them. They can be hard to find around these parts.

 

Anyway, they are gone. Ash had put them in a pen in the barn, but she didn't have one with a lid that was tall enough. She put a tarp over the top - ducks will back off when they hit any kind of barrier, so she was confident they'd stay in. It looks like one of the bleepin' cats got up there and caved the thing in - the whole pen was trashed and the ducks are gone. There's no evidence that anything got them - they probably just flew away. They hadn't been here long enough to know this is home.

 

So then I go out to get Ashley's dog, who was tied out by the barn, and she got away from me. This is the mom of the puppies. Fortunately the puppies were outside, and so she stuck around to play with them instead of taking off. Ashley has NOT done a good job of teaching that dog to come when she's called - she totally ignored me, even though I was tempting her with a treat. Jesse and I spent about 30 minutes trying to catch her. We finally just waited until she wore herself out enough to let us grab hold of her.

 

Oh, and we were out of water again this morning. Someone unplugged the well pump without allowing the tank to fill after laundry and showers were done last night.

 

Can I run away from home now? :wacko:

 

Oh, wait - I am running away from home. Jesse, Ash and I are going to Eeyore's tonight. Amanda needs help training her horse and I have to work tomorrow. Eeyore's trying to lose weight and eat healthy, though, which means she probably doesn't have any chocolate. Sigh.

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Oh thank you my dear friend Looney, I needed a good laugh and trying to picture your barn yard "circus" was just the trick I needed!! I know you will enjoy your visit with our 100 Acre Wood friend, share some extra hugs from the west coast with each other.

 

BLessings,

 

Tigger

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I'm glad I could make you laugh, Tig. It is kinda funny when you're not in the middle of it. :rolleyes:

 

For some reason I am dizzy today. Not so dizzy that I can't stand up, but every time I move my head I get that woozy feeling. I don't feel like it's safe to drive. I was supposed to pick up Eeyore's daughter from her babysitting job this afternoon and had to bail out. HD has a nasty head cold and looks like death warmed over, but he had to go get her, poor guy.

 

So I called my boss and told her that I don't think I can drive in, but I can work from here. She said she'd "check the schedule and get back to me." What she actually did, obviously, was call someone (probably HR) to tell her what to do, and then she called me back and said she is "not allowed" to let me work remote. So I have to take the day off when I really could work, and I know this is really mean, but I hope they are swamped tonight. :angry:

 

Eeyore called the attorney she's working with on her accident and got the name of someone in his office who does labor relations, so I am waiting for him to call me back. This is ridiculous.

 

Eeyore and HD are at her doctor's now discussing surgery for her, so if you are reading this and want to pray, that would be good! :)

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Oh my oh my oh my. If it isn't one thing it's twenty!

 

I sure hope you get a good lawyer to fix those labour relations! Sounds like they're in a pitiful state.

 

God, work out Your Perfect Will for Eeyore, too, I pray. In the Name of Jesus!

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OK, I gotta say that I was less than impressed with the lawyer. He didn't really think I had a case, and he wasn't sure if fibro was a "qualifying disability" under the ADA.

 

So I decided to do a little research on my own, and on my second phone call I talked to a very helpful man who deals with accommodations in the workplace. It turns out that there is no list of "qualifying disabilities" under the ADA. It is not based on your condition, but rather on how it affects your life. Therefore, one person with fibro might be considered disabled, and another might not. I guess I would have expected the attorney to know that.

 

I had previously talked to someone in HR who didn't believe I qualified because the definition of disability is that it "substantially limits one or more major life activities." It turns out that "major life activities" is a pretty long list that includes things I have trouble with, like lifting, sleeping, concentrating, and working. So I think I DO qualify. The man I spoke with sent me to a very helpful website which included a sample letter to request accommodations. He suggested I send it to HR and my manager (keeping copies, of course) and see what they do with it.

 

I've written the letter and printed out some of the information on the website that defines disability, as well as the types of accommodations suggested for someone with fibro. Funny, but one of them is "allow work from home." Gee, who woulda thunk it? :rolleyes:

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PA Mom Murders Children - if you see that headline, it's me. I will be on the run somewhere. Eeyore, you can keep Jesse. Send supportive chocolate to a PO Box and I'll pick it up. :blink:

 

I got home and the kitchen was trashed - again. :angry: Their father has taught his children well - do nothing until Mom throws a temper tantrum. Then, do enough to shut her up. She will gradually forget about it and you can slip back into your old, do-nothing ways. <_>

 

I threw an impressive fit and my kitchen is clean. My children are, at the moment, still alive. I am trying to come up with a solution again - the kitchen has always been the "problem chore" in our family. Personally, since I am working my butt off to feed my offspring, I don't think I should have to do any of it. However, a practical way to enforce that has escaped me for 20 years. I have yet to find anything that will sufficiently motivate them - they tend to get used to whatever consequence I have set and just fall back into doing nothing.

 

Aaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgggggggggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!

 

Sigh.

 

Thank you. I feel better now. :)

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It is hard.

 

I always feel so awful later if I yell.

 

And I have been trying to keep in mind that children are responders. I took my daughter shopping on Sat against my will but she wanted to go. She wanted some overpriced flip flops which I did buy for her, but then it didn't end. She wanted stuff from Forever 21, we got her watch sized for $14 then she wanted to get her ears pierced at Claire's which would have been another $30, and a $5 whatsit at Sephora. by this time I was raving "When will it end? When is enough enough? Is it ever enough? " at her.

 

Mind you, I DESPISE being at the mall. I think all those people who spend their day at the mall are craven and out of their minds. And the freakin mall was packed which was maddening. How can such a huge portion of the population think that is a worthwhile use of their time?

 

However, once I got home, I realized that it would have only cost me $35 to avoid a meltdown on my part and I wouldn't have inflicted the emotional damage of yelling at her on her. I wished I would have just bought the stuff.

 

I will have to regroup and start over.

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I always feel so awful later if I yell. ... Mind you, I DESPISE being at the mall. ...And the freakin mall was packed which was maddening. ... However, once I got home, I realized that it would have only cost me $35 to avoid a meltdown on my part and I wouldn't have inflicted the emotional damage of yelling at her on her. I wished I would have just bought the stuff.

 

I will have to regroup and start over.

The good news is that children are very resilient and very forgiving. They are also very understanding, if we just remember to explain what is going on with us.

 

Six years ago, I was in a car wreck that left me with some serious processing deficits. This means that large crowds, chaotic situations, and lots of noise make me crazy. I have panic attacks when in large groups of people, especially if there is no clear purpose or direction for the crowd. I also have panic attacks if a small group gets overly noisy or rambunctious.

 

I have two teenage boys. Sometimes the two of them are worse than a crowd of a thousand. After a bunch of freaked-out screaming fits, I sat the boys down and explained what had happened to me and why I just could not handle the chaos and rambunctiousness any more. To my surprise, their first reaction was anger --- not at me, but at the wreck and the person who had taken away their "real" mom --- by which I assume they mean the person I used to be. Their subsequent reaction has usually been extreme protection of me. Comments like "It's getting kind of crazy and mom's getting tense. Let's take it outside" or "No, don't ask Mom to take us to Incredible Pizza. She'll flip. Dad can take us there next weekend. Let's see if Mom will take us to Jerry's [the snow-cone place]."

 

And when all precautions fail and I have a meltdown, the boys will usually let me alone until I'm calm, and then they are quick to forgive when I say I'm sorry.

 

All that to say, kids DO respond ... and they respond beautifully if we only remember to keep them informed of what is going on and why. That Golden Rule again. LOL.

Edited by God's Phoenix
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However, a practical way to enforce that has escaped me for 20 years. I have yet to find anything that will sufficiently motivate them - they tend to get used to whatever consequence I have set and just fall back into doing nothing.

 

Buy them only Banquet pot pies (and disposable milk cartons) and show them the oven until they learn how to use the rest of the kitchen and keep it clean?:blink::angry: Soon enough I would hope they'd get tired of pot pies and cry uncle. Meanwhile you won't get arrested for starving them.

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I DESPISE being at the mall. I think all those people who spend their day at the mall are craven and out of their minds.

 

This is one of the reasons I like you, Chrysallis. :)

 

I realized that it would have only cost me $35 to avoid a meltdown on my part and I wouldn't have inflicted the emotional damage of yelling at her on her. I wished I would have just bought the stuff.

 

Yeah, but you can't let her expect that you are just going to buy her whatever she wants, either. Then you end up with a spoiled kid who throws her own meltdown if she doesn't get what she wants. It's a fine line. What I usually do is say, "I can give you X amount of money. That's all I have. Spend it how you want, but when it's gone, it's gone."

 

Dory, my kids love pot pies, and I never buy them. I think it would take a LONG time before they'd get tired of them. But I like the way your mind works. Maybe I'll switch it to peanut butter and water. :angry:

 

My kids do cook - that's part of the problem. No one wants to wash pots and pans, serving dishes, etc. They will make brownies and leave the mixing bowl there for a week. And then I'm gone for 3 days working, and I come home and the same stuff that was on the counter when I left is still there. Ash is tired of trying to make them do it (she is exempt from house chores because she does all the outside/barn chores) and I am tired of coming home to the same mess every time.

 

I need steel bars to drop into all the exits from the kitchen whenever something is placed on the counter or in the sink, and they don't go up again until said item is washed and in its proper place. Anyone know of someone who could design that? :unsure:

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Tunes, what a great idea. You could market that and sell it and make another fortune - lots of parents and wives would order those bars. Maybe you could put the bars on remote control and you have the remote! :P You could dock allowance? That used to work for me when the boys were little.... :huh:

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:)

 

 

 

Yeah, but you can't let her expect that you are just going to buy her whatever she wants, either. Then you end up with a spoiled kid who throws her own meltdown if she doesn't get what she wants. It's a fine line. What I usually do is say, "I can give you X amount of money. That's all I have. Spend it how you want, but when it's gone, it's gone."

 

 

 

I am going to adopt this idea...................Thanks

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Tunes, what a great idea. You could market that and sell it and make another fortune - lots of parents and wives would order those bars.

Did you notice how Faithworks speaks with such Faith, Looney? ie. "You could... make another fortune"! You've already made one in the future!

 

Understand? :rolleyes:

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Try the reverse allowance idea. Give them all a roll of quarters at the beginning of the month. Then have a bank (with a lock on it) stored on your counter top. Every time you have to clean up a bowl, you charge ALL of them a quarter and it goes back into the bank. So if they do the work, the money stays in their pockets, if they don't, then the money goes back to you. Its a reverse order, but when actually deal with the money in your hands, it seems to have the proper effect.

 

I still say tell them "no cooking no baking" unless its pot pies or pop tarts until THEY are ready to clean up the mess. I'd predict about two weeks before they say they are ready. Buy all pies 'turkey', and buy all pop tarts 'unfrosted'. Make them eat them out of their throw away packaging. PB&J's (inexpensive as they are) still mean crumbs, plates, and dirty knives. Go for broke! :D

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So I came home today to a pretty clean kitchen - there were a few dishes in the sink and Ash had just made pasta, but overall it looked pretty good. Wonder how long it's gonna last? :huh:

 

I saw my doc yesterday, and I'm now on meds for my blood pressure. :angry: It's definitely a side effect of the med I'm taking for my fibro. She said she hates to give me a pill for a pill, but since the med is working and I want to stay on it, we need to do something. My BP isn't awful, but it's pretty high for me, and we don't want to leave it there.

 

So Eeyore and I had gone out to do some errands, and I was feeling fine, intending to go to work and all that, and the dizzy thing hit me out of the blue. We were in line at Lowe's, and I almost fell over. I ended up making Eeyore drive home, and I didn't go to work. This is getting really annoying. I'm getting a little concerned about what might happen if this hits when I'm out driving around by myself.

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