Jump to content
God Save My Marriage

Terry's trials and tribulations


Recommended Posts

  • Replies 198
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

  • 2 weeks later...

Checking in I talked with my attorney last night. He will be trying to modify support . his words" even if I could prove Emily is a raging Alcoholic, that would make no difference in your visitation. We have to prove you are safe." . It just mad me feel sad. I am the unsafe one for repentinting and trying to instill morals for our children. It has been 6 months since I have seen my children. I just feel sad over this. He mentioned most likely I will have to wait until the children are older to see them, because of the precedence set. I will continue to pray for the kids, yet JOB and his first family comes to my heart. I am feeling maybe I am supposed to move now. Even my letters have to go through the counselor. I am not to mention praying, church activities ( Vaction Bible School), I am wondering what God has for me next.

Link to post
Share on other sites

Terry - you mentioned Saturday night moderators. The couples calls are not for men in your shoes.. we are here for you on the men's calls. Our moderators on Saturday nights were not supposed to be "your" Saturday night moderators. Sorry for the confusion. Saturday nights are conducted by us now, and you are welcome, of course, to listen in on the couples calls - but to get direct input, you are going to want to join the men's group again. We have to stay firm with that. I had no idea that you were getting on the calls on Saturday nights. That was not fair to the men who pay the $100 per month for the men's calls.

 

Stay in town. That is our advice.

Link to post
Share on other sites
I had no idea that you were getting on the calls on Saturday nights. That was not fair to the men who pay the $100 per month for the men's calls.

 

Just FYI, Joel, Terry wasn't getting advice on the Saturday calls. He'd wait till the end and just chit chat a bit (usually while doing dishes! ;) ) after the couples were done talking.

 

I agree with staying near your kids - even if you can't see them, they need to know you want to see them. If you move away, they will feel abandoned.

Link to post
Share on other sites

More set back today. I go to the kids counselor to drop off their back packs and school supplies. It was then the counselor informed me she will not be taking these items, as it is putting her in the middle. My first thought is you are the one that took away my parenting rights, after the children question Michael being there. So you placed the children I'n the middle. I went to the school and explained the situation, and they allowed me to leave them there. I called my attorney and he informed me that I need to show I am safe around the children. Even they proved Emily was with an abusive Alcoholic, all this would do is place them in a foster home.

 

So here is some writing I did after

 

This is the story that began a decade ago.

I went to an AA meeting a top my steel ride,

Only to gaze upon one that would later become my bride.

 

Her radiant beauty one could not compare,

just a backwards glance from her, and to the ground I Stare.

A roof overhead & food on the table, I foolishly felt everything was stable.

As long as you have this the rest is fun, but through control and negligence

the bride proclaimed she was done!

 

Alcohol could not supress the pain of smashed dreams.

During the separation of just over a year, came the arrival of a Co-worker & selfishly he sought.

His actions screamed "Covenant of marriage be Damned" as long as my needs are met the cost is of no matter.

The man who's age, the bride could pass for a daughter,

Setting our children up as though cannon fodder.

 

One night the Co-worker thought to himself, through Perjury and slander

I can stir up strife & ideals will be lost that this was ones wife. Then the

Courts will not focus on me, ignoring the fact of Adultry.

 

Only when I marry her, will my masks come down.

Then the truth is all blurred, my actions ensuring no one else is around.

To the other's who disagree, It's selfish motives, and misery.

 

( To my children, from the bride of my youth)

Alcohol does not stop the pain, Nor does someone new.

Rely on the Father, Son, & Holy Ghost to slowly walk you through.

 

Ok done with my rant.

Link to post
Share on other sites
Only when I marry her, will my masks come down.

Then the truth is all blurred, my actions ensuring no one else is around.

 

Terry - this is so true. Hang in there, buddy.

 

This guys mask is going to come crashing down soon enough.

 

This is a horrid time in circumstances that you are going through.. but after going through the fire, if you stay faithful to the Lord, you are going to come out purified and walking in grace. We feel for you Terry.

Link to post
Share on other sites
  • 4 weeks later...

Just checking in during my waiting period. The more I read and grow, my heart breaks for this situation. Reading things by Townsend and cloud. Dr. James Dobsen etc . On a National level and in my heart I am doing what is right. It appears that due to Washington ranking #1 in unchurched I am wrong. Just like Job I will continue to praise God. I informed the attorney I will continue to follow God. It is to bad In doing so I am deemed unsafe. I noticed a common theme between the GAL and the counselor. Both have a worldly view, and claim that the Bible is a book of sugesstions for life, but there are others. I feel as though there is not a separation of church and state. It is through their lack of belief that has made them feel my teaching our children morals and values from the Bible. I do not feel compromising on the Truth, to appease the courts is something I can do.

Link to post
Share on other sites
  • 4 weeks later...

Checking in settlement conferance on the 3rd. I have legal counsel this time. Still have not seen or talked to our children since Easter. Prayers asked so the God will move on behalf of the children. No matter what the decision for me to praise God.

Link to post
Share on other sites

Checking in settlement conferance on the 3rd. I have legal counsel this time. Still have not seen or talked to our children since Easter. Prayers asked so the God will move on behalf of the children. No matter what the decision for me to praise God.

 

What a travesty!

Dear heavenly Father

Please work in this situation so Terry can see his children. This is so wrong!

Link to post
Share on other sites

Checking in settlement conferance on the 3rd. I have legal counsel this time. Still have not seen or talked to our children since Easter. Prayers asked so the God will move on behalf of the children. No matter what the decision for me to praise God.

 

Terry,

Did she legalize her adultery this summer?

Link to post
Share on other sites

Terry,

Did she legalize her adultery this summer?

 

I do not know. They did not mention this in court, but the no contact order stays as well.

I had court this morning. I get to see our children 2 hours of supervised visitation a week. While driving there this morning, I had been listening to The Book of Act and Romans on my "word of Promise" audio Bible. That came to mind and a smile came across my face. Emily had already left, but both attorneys were there. Mine asked why I was smiling, as it did not go the way he would have liked. I said for reading our children Bible stories, and scripture, I get vilified in court. There are far greater men then myself that have been vilified in the courts of Law for proclaiming God, so I feel Blessed as God must have something big in store for me. As both claim to be Christians, I left them just staring. In retrospect I can not help thinking " God has left the court Room" ones even claiming to be Christian have become influenced by the world. As my pastor, my life skills counselor,and my doc at the VA mentioned before they could not understand the bases of the claim.

These are a couple of websites I have been spending at least to hours in the morning studying I wanted to share.

gospelway.com

 

www.raptureforums.com/BibleMapsCharts/index.cfm this one has charts,commentary. and a topical index

Link to post
Share on other sites
  • 3 weeks later...

I found out tonight that Emily did get married this last summer. I figured there was some reason why, she removed me from the children's lives. I am talking with someone to try and get sometime with the kids. I was doing a study on the word yesterday in the Surmon on the Mount.

I came across this in Matthew Henry's commentary on Meek. It resounded to me.

 

Blessed are the meek

The meek are those who quietly submit themselves to God, to his word, and to his rod. Who follow his directions and comply with his designs, and are gentle towards all men

(TiT 3.2) who can bear provocation without being inflamed by it; are either silent, or return a soft answer, and who can show displeasure when there is occasion for it without being transported to indecencies.

 

So, now Ex married, and counselor under the influence of pain patches has lied about me, to orchestrate removing me from our children, so they are exposed to alchol and adultery without impunity. I have repented changed my actions, yet my children are even farther away. I keep telling myself that all things work out for the good for those that Believe. Yet I look at this whole thing, and Satan has had his way with this. I honestly feel like God is removing me for a reason, as this has gone on. Then I go back to I am the catalyst that turned Emily from God. I just do not know.Because I feel that until Emily submits to God, it will be a source for her to make claims. Maybe not considering I have no legal say I'n anything now.

Link to post
Share on other sites

I found out tonight that Emily did get married this last summer. I figured there was some reason why, she removed me from the children's lives. I am talking with someone to try and get sometime with the kids. I was doing a study on the word yesterday in the Surmon on the Mount.

I came across this in Matthew Henry's commentary on Meek. It resounded to me.

 

Blessed are the meek

The meek are those who quietly submit themselves to God, to his word, and to his rod. Who follow his directions and comply with his designs, and are gentle towards all men

(TiT 3.2) who can bear provocation without being inflamed by it; are either silent, or return a soft answer, and who can show displeasure when there is occasion for it without being transported to indecencies.

 

So, now Ex married, and counselor under the influence of pain patches has lied about me, to orchestrate removing me from our children, so they are exposed to alchol and adultery without impunity. I have repented changed my actions, yet my children are even farther away. I keep telling myself that all things work out for the good for those that Believe. Yet I look at this whole thing, and Satan has had his way with this. I honestly feel like God is removing me for a reason, as this has gone on. Then I go back to I am the catalyst that turned Emily from God. I just do not know.Because I feel that until Emily submits to God, it will be a source for her to make claims. Maybe not considering I have no legal say I'n anything now.

 

Oh I am so sorry. Keep angling to see the kids and be sure to get them some Christmas stuff. I don't know what else to do but keep praying and hoping; it's better than giving up.

Link to post
Share on other sites
  • 2 weeks later...

Checking in, the supervisor is still playing phone tag with the counselor. I did talk with amother attorney. He mentioned their was some unethical things Emily's attorney had done. Of course then, in the next sentance states she is a colleague I will not go against her. My thoughts were the attorney can blatantly lie to mislead the judge, to bring the proceedings where it is. I get to pay to see our children, and you do not want her to look bad! I did see our oldest daughter Dakota 10 the other day. She seen me but was real indifferent, she would not even look at me, just looking off in other directions now. It makes me wonder what else they are being told. I miss our children, after not seeing each other In 7 months I thought her response would have been different. It made me think, I have been fighting to see them. I understand teenagers do not want to be around their parents, but a 10 year old! I know GOD is incharge, part of me sAys wait until they are older. They have been poisoned for now. With everything they are now exposed to and being told.

Link to post
Share on other sites

It's tough.

 

Just be careful that you don't respond to your children's responses to life. Whether they know it or not, they need to see you as a rock of a man who initiates kindness and fatherly love toward them, at every possible turn, no matter what.

 

Your 10-year-old hurts, the poor girl.

 

God bless you, Terry, as you stick it out.

 

 

Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

Loading...

×
×
  • Create New...