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Another good devotional for the day I needed to read...

 

Faith Tabernacle                               http://ft111.com

 

March 2, 2015  

 
 
THE TRUMPET by BILL BURNS:
I am calling you, My people, to a higher level of living, to a higher place of believing--a place in which you will be trained to rule and reign with Me over the nations, over those things that are to come.  So, I encourage you to begin today by ruling over your own life, over your own situations and circumstances.  Exercise your kingship today over the arenas that I have placed you in so that your habitations become the habitation of Christ.  And, let those habitations become anointed.  May it happen today, says the Lord.
 
SMALL STRAWS IN A SOFT WIND by MARSHA BURNS:  
Some things are just not predictable because of free will and change.  In these matters you will just have to wait and see.  This is a time when you will be able to learn to let go, stop trying to control, and exercise patience.  You can only respond to these situations when you have strong faith that everything will work to your ultimate spiritual benefit, says the Lord.  Romans 8:28 And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose.
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I don't think you want exactly the same opportunity to serve your wife, Choose Love, as that man in the story in your previous post. You can serve her just fine for 60 years without her having to lose her memory. Right? You actually want the best for her, I'm sure.

 

Just wanted to pick that apart a bit. :)

 

I really like the message by Bill Burns. We learn to reign with God over the big stuff by beginning with ourselves. More people need to know this and do it! It would save a lot of trouble in the world! And in marriages.

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Thanks MJ you are right.  I would love to have 60 years with my wife however.   :razz:  I am thankful for each day I have with her.  

 

An area I continue to die to is my expectations of her or desired response.  From devotions this morning I was convicted of this...

 

When God changed Abram's name to Abraham His promise to him was that the focus of his life was not to be on himself or his position, not even on what God would make him to be.  No, how the goal of Abraham's life was to be others, how God would use him to touch countless other with the life and blessing of God. (Genesis 17:5)

 

Philippians 2:25-30 - tells the story of Epaphroditus, who personally sacrificed for God's people and work in the kingdom.  The verses remind us that even faithful workers for God struggle and suffer.  Remember God always has a bigger picture in mind beyond what we see with our earthly perspective.

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I think it's alright for you to have that hope for a "desired response".  Jesus did everything He did -- for the joy that was set before Him.  It's just that the hope you have for a full, thorough, loving, marital relationship with your wife will have to be tempered by the strength of the Holy Spirit and all the things you are already doing. 

 

Be blessed by Christ, your Source. 

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I think it's alright for you to have that hope for a "desired response".

Helpful thought MJ. I think at times I believe that if I feel any semblance of a desired response, that implies I am being self-serving. Christ-like actions and blessing another do not necessarily have to be mutually exclusive...as long as the desired outcome is not the dominant driving force behind the actions rather than the desire to bless another. This is a change in thinking for me. Plus, I think it would be a lie to say I didn't desire an outcome. I just have to watch that I'm not controlled by it.

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Helpful thought MJ. I think at times I believe that if I feel any semblance of a desired response, that implies I am being self-serving. Christ-like actions and blessing another do not necessarily have to be mutually exclusive...as long as the desired outcome is not the dominant driving force behind the actions rather than the desire to bless another. This is a change in thinking for me. Plus, I think it would be a lie to say I didn't desire an outcome. I just have to watch that I'm not controlled by it.

That is right 7Times.  I think early on in the ministry it probably good to have your default mode of checking your desired response or outcome.  Check your motivation.  Over time I am now realizing that I need to be accepting of who I am as a person (good and bad traits) while continuing to become more Christlike.  The journey ends when we are with our Heavenly Father, so while on this earth we will continue to struggle.  Acknowledge your ways before Him.  Embrace that you are uniquely and wonderfully made in His image, but that it is just an image, not perfection.  We are those jars of clay that continually are reformed and refined.  Let us not grow weary of doing good, giving God the glory, praising Him in all circumstances.  I rejoice with you brother as we draw nearer to Him.

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Good morning friends, I just read a good devotional for Lent at http://eurasiablog.lcms.org/eurasia-blog-wednesday-devotion-his-steadfast-love-endures-forever/.  The focused scripture was that of Psalm 136.

 

Give thanks to the Lord, for he is good.
His love endures forever.

 

I pray that we all remember His love, it never fails and is always there for us.  The world will one day pass away, but His love will not.  Let us hold onto the promises, those spoken in Psalm 136 and throughout the Bible.  May we not lose heart, putting on the full armour of God being salt and light to the world.  My we share the love of Christ with our wife, children and the world pointing to our Savior.  Have a blessed day friends.  You are loved.

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Heard this song on the radio today.  I have really come to enjoy the group For King & Country.  

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NM-Bf9gE0gw

 

Also reading,The Dude's Guide to Manhood: Finding True Manliness in a World of Counterfeits this weekend and focused on how I can be content in all circumstances (Philippians 4:10-13).  Thankful for the opportunity to take my beautiful bride out to a local garden and a crepe lunch. We had a nice weekend overall.

 

I still see areas for grow, particularly in how to be the strong man she needs, being clear and living with her in an understanding way.  There are my own idiosyncrasies I continue to beat down in order that I may show her consideration for her preferences and concerns.  It really is a joy to find ways to give and give abundantly.  I see how God's promise from Luke 6:38 is so important in this journey.  As I continue to give, He provides for my peace, joy and ultimate contentment.  Have a blessed day friends.  

Edited by ChooseLove
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In what way do you believe you need to be strong for your wife, ChooseLove?

 

There is a position in which all of us need to become comfortable. Here, we talk about "coming from a position of strength." It's often the wife who needs to learn this because she has been so afraid for so long of irritating her husband if she lets him know he is hurting her. She doesn't want to lose the small amount of "love" he is already giving her.

 

However, husbands also need to learn this lesson. They need to know deep down inside of them, preferably as a revelation from God Himself, that they are OKAY people -- because of the Blood of Jesus, of course. They are clean. They are forgiven (by God). They can, with CONFIDENCE, speak to their wives, do things for them, and show them love.

 

When a husband interacts with his wife, coming from this "position of strength," she senses it, and finds it reassuring.

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MJ that is a good question.  I agree with you it has taken me quite awhile to fully accept I am good with God, that he accepts and loves me wholly as I am.  That is something I remind myself of daily, of how loved I am.  For a long time I did not fully grasp that, hence crashing so hard when my wife pulled away.  I see now how much better a place I am for my wife and children. 
 
As to coming from a place of strength, I am still learning to check my motivation and intention.  I am slow to speak to my wife regarding anything that might even appear negative, critical or judgemental.  I want to encourage and help her, but my past just showed it was more about control and less about truly loving her. I have not always chosen the best time to bring up topics or fully considered how my interaction may affect her.  I have really taken time to understand temperaments/personality as that plays into our interactions a lot, with be being the extrovert and my wife the introvert.  We are quite different in many ways, but I believe that is why God brought us together, to really learn how to love another person. There is a song by Sara Groves that really speaks to me about how to love another person that I pray my wife and I are able to embrace completely in time. Many of the traits that drew us together have become a source of irritation/frustration. 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_bSrkPSsnic

 

I do my best to create an environment of grace and safety.  I keep my chin-up, working to be that source of strength and life.  Since I found this ministry I have been passionately pursuing change and personal growth in becoming more Christlike in all areas of my life (e.g.,, started going to the gym for the first time last October) so I may be that man of strength - emotionally, physically and spiritually.

 

My wife has been so wounded I know it is hard to open up to me.  I pray overtime she feels safer and willing to connect more deeply.  To that end I remain steadfast, persistent, not shrinking back when there are bumps, rather finding the best way to navigating them by staying the word and of course being plugged into the ministry.  It is my hope and trust in the Lord she will become more comfortable as will I so that we are not holding back from each other, but rather able to be transparent and forthright in all areas of our life - living an OHM!

 

Philippians 4:4-8

 

Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding,will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.

Edited by ChooseLove
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CL, I've heard that song a bunch of times, but for some reason it just hit me differently. Although my marriage is lost (at least for the moment), that doesn't have anything to do with what these lyrics talk about. Because of my situation, I think my marriage situation has often prevented me from living this way in other areas of my life because of emotions.This is a good reminder, that I should continue "loving like I'm not scared" regardless of circumstances.

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Faith Tabernacle                                                    http://ft111.com

 

March 26, 2015  

 
SMALL STRAWS IN A SOFT WIND by MARSHA BURNS:

 

You are in a time of transition between that which is coming to a close and that which is just ahead.  There will be a very distinct difference between where you have been and where you are going.  You are about to ascend to a higher level of spiritual existence.  Letting go of the past is vital to your freedom in moving ahead.  Stay clear and clean so that you can hear My voice and discern My leading, says the Lord.  

 

Ephesians 1:4 ... He chose us in Him before the foundation of the world, that we should be holy and without blame before Him in love. 

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Thanks MJ.  Often times it is a moment by moment process.  I pray the Lord steadies me as I aim for an OHM with my wife.  My heart aches for her in a good way and I see there is still healing that needs to take place.  I catch myself getting impatient wanting to see more response/confirmation that I am loving her in the right way.  In those times I seek to quiet my mind and pray for guidance from the Lord.  Be slow to speak and quick to listen. I pray for my wife's wounded heart daily, that she would be made whole through her faith in Christ and that I can bless her in all my thoughts, words and deeds.  Today was a good morning as I was able to make her breakfast in bed and give her a gentle kiss as I left for work.  Oh how I love my wife.

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Whenever you feel the need to point out to your wife that you're changing... You're really not.. Let your actions speak for you, not your mouth ;)

God bless

And one more helpful hint.... Your wife said she needs time.. So NEVER ask her for a status update... That WILL put pressure on her and you might not like the answer..... Just keep living this out and be Christlike.. Your wife will give you updates when HER heart is ready.... PLUS.. You don't want to be looked at as a puppy doing tricks for a treat... Just maintain and let God work ....

God bless

Read this again today . Thanks Charles.

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Make it a great day friends.

 

Faith Tabernacle                                                    http://ft111.com

 

April 2, 2015  

 
SMALL STRAWS IN A SOFT WIND by MARSHA BURNS:
For those of you, My people, who are stressed because of your work load or circumstances, take a deep breath.  I tell you truthfully that everything is going to be all right.  No need to worry.  Take every opportunity to relax even if it is for a few minutes, and re-focus on knowing you have My Spirit to comfort you and lead you to peace and safety, says the Lord.  You are not alone.  

Psalms 31:3 For You are my rock and my fortress; therefore, for Your name's sake, lead me and guide me.  
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This really spoke to me today..  Praying for a breakthrough.  

 

 

 
Faith Tabernacle                                                    http://ft111.com

 

April 7, 2015  

 
SMALL STRAWS IN A SOFT WIND by MARSHA BURNS:
Get ready to emerge from a transitional time when progression seemed to have stalled.  It's not that you haven't accomplished what was necessary, but forward motion was difficult and hindered at best--almost like walking through mud.  You will soon sense a time of release as you move with less restriction and greater freedom, says the Lord.  

Philippians 3:13 Brethren, I do not count myself to have apprehended; but one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind and reaching forward to those things which are ahead.

 

amos5_14new15.jpg

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Thanks MJ.  

 

I fully recognize I need to love my wife where she is at.  At times the distance is hard to bear, but I take it to the Lord and he gives me what I need.  For example in the past my hugs and kisses were more for me than for her.  I have really worked to catch myself, my motivation in this area.  For months there has been little in the way of hugs, kisses or the like.  She has felt smothered by me in different ways as well (cards, gifts, online posts/messages).  I honestly have really thought to check my motivations and intention so as to NOT do that, but alas if that is what my wife is perceiving than I need to reevaluate my actions.  I really have come to appreciate the 20/20/20/20 rule the ministry teaches, but all in God's time. I do the best I can where I am at.  I need to continue to have faith and claim the marriage restoration.  Not being double-minded in anyway.

 

I continue to learn more and apply what I can to improving myself as a Christlike man, drawing closer to God, be it through reading scriptures/devotionals, exercising (2-3 times a week), or meeting and encouraging other men (men's call).  One area I see I can continue to learn is how to love an introvert (I am an extrovert).  I have a pretty good sense of our temperaments through what I have gleaned from the ministry, but would really like us both to get evaluated at some point to gain further insight.  I am reading more about my fear of abandonment as it relates to fear of intimacy.

 

One other area I am focusing on as a man is not merely being nice, but rather good.  I need to learn to get to the core of who I am in Christ and not be nice for the sake of nice.  Learning about how dynamic Christ was and the different ways he related to people.  I mistakenly have put him in the "nice guy" category too often and realize Christ was so much more than that. 

 

So there you have a snapshot of where I am at.  Today I am fortunate to take care of our kids as my wife is not feeling well working from home.  Have a great day friends.  May God bless you and keep you and may His face shine upon you.  You are so loved!

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