skiingco Posted March 22, 2015 Author Report Share Posted March 22, 2015 Finally, Sunday, can go to church and be in the house of the Lord.....I pray he puts his hands on me, guides me, strengthens me, I pray he touches the heart of my wife, heals her and I pray that he casts away any negative associations she has to make her realize we can be a happy, loving family Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
skiingco Posted March 22, 2015 Author Report Share Posted March 22, 2015 This is bad......I couldn't even concentrate on praying the Rosary before service and............here is some coincidence.......at the end of the Priest's sermon he looked at the congregation and said, "GOD loves you"..........yes, my thoughts did indeed race back to earlier responses to my post Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TimothyPaul Posted March 22, 2015 Report Share Posted March 22, 2015 “Skiingco is patient and kind. Skiingco is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. Skiingco does not demand his own way. Skiingco is not irritable, and he keeps no record of being wronged. Skiingco does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. Skiingco never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.” 1 Corinthians 13:4-7 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
For Him For Her Posted March 22, 2015 Report Share Posted March 22, 2015 Amen! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
InTheSearchOfTruth Posted March 22, 2015 Report Share Posted March 22, 2015 Not sure if it is OK to post on someone's topic or not but taking a chance. This morning on the way to service Jesus spoke to me as he often does with a word picture. He was holding someone (me?) at arms length and they were just wildly swing their arms at Him. Mind you His arm was just long enough that there was no way anyone was going to hit Him. He seemed to have a slight smile on His face. Maybe He was thinking "Are you done yet?" Anyway that hit home (no pun intended) as how often have I done that. The sad thing is often when I quite swinging I would then turn and walk away. What a waste of energy. So much easier to let Him embrace you and listen. The job at hand may not be easy, and I am finding He wants me to do the job, not Him. I get that, name one job where you go to work get paid and the boss does all the work for you. Our pastor is an ex missionary who served in Bolivia in the late 70's to early 80's. He was telling us today how it took years for the seeds of the gospel to start to grow with the group they were working with. How at times they grew very discouraged in the work. Yet over time the seeds that were planted did take root and start to grow. He knew the job at hand as Christ had laid it out. He knew the risk that the seeds might not grow. He knew that his family could all loose their lives in doing what Christ had asked, yet they said "Yes Lord, I will do as you ask." I could bring that full circle to marriage and what Christ has called me to do as a husband. Actually when you render out the lard it comes down to love you wife. Nothing more nothing less. Not sure why I had to get into the arm swinging and waste a lot of precious time and energy, neither which can every be replaced. He gave me a job assignment when I said "I do" so not sure why I ever thought I could then pass it off on Him to do that for me. In our bulletin today from Luke I read "If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross daily, and follow me." There's that hard pill to swallow again "deny himself", well Lord if you say I must then I will. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
skiingco Posted March 22, 2015 Author Report Share Posted March 22, 2015 Wow...very interesting posts, and I am indebted. I left today, had a sandwich, saw a matinee and went to visit my cousins.....as you could tell I was going insane. I have no clue what Christ is doing......I have no clue what the plan is......my wife had questions about the letter I drafted her, texted I had to drive home and could talk when I got home.....I am here, and she is not speaking to me.......I am ok, this is her decision to avoid me......I don't know what it is I am supposed to be hearing from all these posts........what is sticking in my head is to love her, be patient, be kind, don't retaliate........ok, that is easy enough, she doesn't want anything to do with me........and for, now while the military paycheck is coming in, continue to pay all the bills..........ok, I am not invited to anything she does with our boys........I don't see Christ at work helping us, maybe one day I will wake up and be surprised for the better or maybe she will just reject everything and insist on making sure our family breaks apart......I have another surgery that is supposed to happen 13 May and I was supposed to go to Boy Scout Summer Camp with my son's troop again in GA......just don't know Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
skiingco Posted March 25, 2015 Author Report Share Posted March 25, 2015 240am and thinking about the argument yesterday....she told me to stop the lawyer fighting for retiremt ext....said so many crude things about the affair...she has always harbored things and carried around luggage....this habit of hers the cause for arguments before...20 years of holding grudges...I blame her evil wretched mother for my wifes inability to get out of the past and inability to not dwell negative issues...prayer prayer prayer Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
4evrHZdtr3 Posted March 25, 2015 Report Share Posted March 25, 2015 Just wondering.. are you willing to hear from me as a woman? You seem to have ignored everything I have posted. I might have some answers that could help you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
skiingco Posted March 25, 2015 Author Report Share Posted March 25, 2015 not ignoring..dealing with an angry woman who hates me..I am all ears Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
skiingco Posted March 25, 2015 Author Report Share Posted March 25, 2015 oh by the way my kids are distancing from me Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
InTheSearchOfTruth Posted March 25, 2015 Report Share Posted March 25, 2015 (edited) Skiingco just wondering what it is your praying for; your will or Gods will in all this. For my situation things started changing when I started asking that Gods will be done. You do not need to answer that on here just something for you to think about. Edited March 25, 2015 by InTheSearchOfTruth Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
skiingco Posted March 25, 2015 Author Report Share Posted March 25, 2015 believe his will be done and praying it includes family stays 2gthr...I know only by his grace will we stay 2gthr Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
skiingco Posted March 25, 2015 Author Report Share Posted March 25, 2015 back home.......wife and kids got home from dojo same time I arrived......wife used van and i was in process of backing it up for her when they drove up...her daily car is a Toyota Prius C.....was nice to be able to hug them....took my foot out of my walking boot and was just sitting by my 7 yr old while he played on Samsung Tablet and soon to be 12 year old doing homework......wife started dinner and oven then went upstairs........she made it clear she wants to be left alone in her blowout yesterday, so I am back to morning and night text and prayers..... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
skiingco Posted March 26, 2015 Author Report Share Posted March 26, 2015 retaliation.......she pulled down the negligees that were hanging in the master bath and the anniversary balloons from last week are nowhere to be seen Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TimothyPaul Posted March 26, 2015 Report Share Posted March 26, 2015 How much time do you spend in your pity party feeling sorry for yourself, and how much time focusing on becoming a Christ like man. Your wife is not going to even think about softening her heart while you continue being a narcissist. TP Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
skiingco Posted March 26, 2015 Author Report Share Posted March 26, 2015 just an observation TimPaul....not a pity party.....look at all my posts, you will see I have said from the beginning I am praying for GOD's intervention......my cousin made a very interesting point, I turned to GOD for forgiveness and for help......he remarked that if she is not seeking to put GOD back in our lives, then where does that leave us? none of these posts give me anything to actually apply......I get instructions from Joel, bounce off him when to back off, on a daily basis I am by myself with the exception of praying and wondering where is GOD at work.......she is angry and filled with hate......I continue to wait where does the prayer lead to Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TimothyPaul Posted March 26, 2015 Report Share Posted March 26, 2015 I dont do the practical. For me, its all the spiritual. Joel is good at the pratical. Everything I type is to make you think. I've been where you are now. I get it. Lost my wife and two kids becuase I was an idiot. But through His grace and a lot of freaking work on my part, I have a fantastic relationship with my ex and my kids today. (you can ask Joel or Tony) The work was all about getting myself right with God so that when I step on the scale, Jesus will balance it and I can hear "well done, my good a faithful servant". Notice I didnt say anything about working to get my wife and kids back. Your cousin is wrong. - It is the man that is the Spiritual leader of the house. Your wife can only come back to CHrist when she sees CHrist in you (or the next guy she ends up with). You are God's missionary to your family. God expects you to be the one who shines His Light to your wife. Look back at Ephesians 5:25-32. You are to go to the Cross for your wife like Christ did. He went to the Cross for you without any expectations. You go to the Cross for your wife without any expectations. God has already designed this (see 1 Cor 7) I've been doing counseling for over 5 years now. I've run many many men's calls, coulpes calls and have made 1000's of posts on these forums. When I tell you there is anger and bitterness in your heart - whether you beleive it or not, just trust my experience and wisdom from doing thisfor so long. Also, and I don't know why God brought me back here, but I came out of retirement to write to you. I realize the line above about the "next guy" is cruel, but I'm trying to shock you into the reality of what is going to happen if you don't figure this out. It's going to be a flippin knife that stabs you in the chest, and the pain will probably make you throw up. (see sentence 5 in the first paragraph) I would like to see you writing about how you blessed your wife and kids. And I expect them to ignore it. But you do it anyway and then still do it, no matter how you are treated. I would like to see the humility of washing their feet as you are called to as the Christ like servant you are called to be. WHen the Lord answers prayer, it is when we go to the Father in humilty and the prupose is to Glorify the Father, not ourselves. Look at the scripure when Jesus tells us to go before His Father. He specifically says the prayer will be answered when the result is to glorify our heavenly Father. Is that why you want to restore your family? I'm not seeing it. Nel servizio di Dio.....TimothyPaul Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
skiingco Posted March 26, 2015 Author Report Share Posted March 26, 2015 TimPaul, I believe the Holy Spirit got me to the ministry, and I give face value acceptance you and others are here to help me.......I am pleading to GOD to take you and others, be with me in her presence, somehow, move her to believe I and the family are worth finding a way to work through this....what is incredibly hard and frustrating, is my wife says bad things about the ministry, insults the women who are involved in the ministry and then says anything I am told to to only makes her more mad, yet I have David who made it back to his wife.....Joel happen to have a wife that turned to Christ and made a decision to make their marriage reconcile.......I don't have that with my wife.......she seems to be perfectly comfortable taking what money she can get, using her new found improvements and give the effort to someone in the future that will never compare once so ever to what I did for her and my boys in 20 years.....I don't want to lose her, I don't want to dwell on her desire to break away, i don't want to dwell she has cart Blanche disregarded all the days/years I was the devoted husband doing things she wanted, accepted living simple instead of doing things and traveling with her and the kids, and...........I have done massive manual labor on our homes to make us money for selling when the time came.....I am a handy man on the house..........all that gone...............I desperately want to find something that gives my wife a way to stop and think ok, they are worth it.......I will consider.....and then later, to get her commitment to stay together........it is 132AM, I woke back up after having two Narco, a lunesta, a Phenargan........I am glad I am calm enough to write my thoughts for everone here and and now pray to GOD, Heavenly Father, Lord Jesus Christ, I come to you again, ashamed, for the horrible damage that I caused your children, through my desires to commit adultery, leaving in my path a wake of pain, injury to my family and the family of another woman i was with. I pray lord you will bring healing in all their hearts, I pray lord you will place your hands on everyone to heal, that you will guide me lord, grant me the privelage of being a father and husband to my wife and kids again Lord, that I will be annointed to be your Shepard for my family and bring us back to your Altar Lord, King of Kings, and make our home your home.......Be with me Lord I pray every day, to be the Force of Life, to bring bright, flowing Love to my family and do all things good in your name, praising your sacrifice, rejoicing at your covenant with us, and smiling, being moved by the day you come again and take us to Heaven, I ask all these in your precious, in the name of the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit, Amen. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
skiingco Posted March 26, 2015 Author Report Share Posted March 26, 2015 Most sweet Jesus, humbly kneeling at Thy feet, we renew the consecration of our family to Thy Divine Heart. Be Thou our King forever. In Thee we have full and entire confidence. May Thy spirit penetrate our thoughts, our desires, our words and our works. Bless our undertakings, share in our joys, in our trials and in our labours. Grant us to know Thee more, to serve Thee without faltering.By the Immaculate Heart of Mary, Queen of Peace, set up Thy kingdom in our country. Enter closely into the midst of our families and make them Thine own through the solemn enthronement of Thy Sacred Heart so that no one cry may respond from home to home. May the triumphant Heart of Jesus be everywhere loved, blessed and glorified forever! Honour and glory to the Sacred Heart of Jesus and Mary. Sacred Heart of Jesus protect our families. Therefore with angels and archangels, and with all the company of heaven, we proclaim your great and glorious name, for ever praising you and saying Holy, Holy, Holy Lord, GOD of power and might, Heaven and earth, ARE full of your Glory, Hosanna in the Highest, I pray Lord as you have said, to still me in your Presence, and enlighten me to know, YOU ARE the Lord, and to not fear the face of evil taking my family in this time of pain, that I would rejoice and state that in your name, ALL THINGS are possible. I do as you say Lord, I ask, I seek, and knock Lord, to grant me the privelage, humility, and blessings to be with my family and serve them selfessly, as you did Lord, when you died for our Sins on the cross. Lord guide me to die and wake each die to serve my family and bring them to a covenant with you Lord, to never turn away again. All have sinned and fallen short of your Glory, in this hour Lord, I pray your presence come to us now in the quiet of their sleep, that you Lord will show, that we are loved by you, and that you are hear to take away our bitterness, our hurt, our fear and to show us your love and bright light of the refreshed cleansing of our souls through the Baptism all of us took to be in your covenant Lord. I pray these things in your name.Amen. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
skiingco Posted March 26, 2015 Author Report Share Posted March 26, 2015 Heavenly Father, Jesus Christ King of Kings, I came to you with Sin at the altar, asking your grace to remove my carnal desires and purify my thoughts to not focus on the passion I no longer have with my wife after betraying her. Lord, I pray you will take all my energy, all my capabilities and show me the path to do your will in leading my family to healing Lord to being a family in covenant with you again. Lord I pray that you will endow me with bodily healing of my ailments and grant me the strength to Love and Cherish my wife as a reunited couple and love her as your beautiful child as a caring , respectful husband should. Be with me Lord to open my eyes, my heart, my mind, to Love my family, your children as I should. I pray Lord that my heart, my mind, my body is healed for the tasks at hand to be done in your will with your Grace, in the name of the Father, and the Son and Holy Spirit, Amen. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
InTheSearchOfTruth Posted March 26, 2015 Report Share Posted March 26, 2015 Skiingco you said yesterday when asked that you were praying Gods will in this. Can you tell us what that looks like? What do you see your roll is in this for God to accomplish His will? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
skiingco Posted March 26, 2015 Author Report Share Posted March 26, 2015 he need to be eradicated of anger and inspired as a source to the family Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
InTheSearchOfTruth Posted March 26, 2015 Report Share Posted March 26, 2015 he need to be eradicated of anger and inspired as a source to the familySo how do you see the Lord getting you to that point. What is the game plan he has showed you? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ChooseLove Posted March 26, 2015 Report Share Posted March 26, 2015 (edited) Read this today and thought it was relevant to your recent posts skiing co. Praying for you and your family today. Today's Verse for 03/26/2015...while we wait for the blessed hope — the glorious appearing of our great God and Savior, Jesus Christ, who gave himself for us to redeem us from all wickedness and to purify for himself a people that are his very own, eager to do what is good. — Titus 2:13-14Share on Facebook | Discuss this Verse ThoughtSome of the most basic and elevated statements about Jesus are made in 1 & 2 Timothy and Titus. These letters are devoted to help ministers mature churches in difficult places. They are incredibly practical, but also are rooted in the work of Jesus, his divinity, and his faithfulness. We are waiting for the Faithful One! We trust that he will come for us because of what he sacrificed to redeem us. While we wait, we honor his mission by being a people eager to do what is good, showing in our lives that he is our Lord. PrayerO God, I find myself waiting for Jesus. Because he is coming for me, I know my life has direction and meaning even on those days that are long, hard, and seemingly fruitless. Fire my heart to wait longingly for Jesus' glorious appearing and stir my desires to want what is only good and holy. I want to see you! But, dear Lord, I also long to be like you! In the glorious name of Jesus I pray. Amen.The Thoughts and Prayers for Today's Verse are written by Phil Ware. You can email questions or comments to phil@heartlight.org.Today's Verse Illustrated Edited March 26, 2015 by ChooseLove Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
skiingco Posted March 27, 2015 Author Report Share Posted March 27, 2015 thanks CL.....that made me think of The Green Mile, when the elder Paul (Hank's character), is closing the movie saying the mile can be so long at times.....I am looking forward to Mass in the morning and will meditate on this......thank you for continued prayers Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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