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Day 12, Wednesday:  It was kind of a quiet day.

 

I had supper almost ready when he got home from work. Wednesday's are always kind of rushed with eating and leaving for church. Not too many weeks ago he was frustrated with my trying to get the dishes done before leaving. Last night he was right there helping me get them done so we could get changed and leave. And guess what.....we made it on time!!!!!!

 

It was very nice to get back from church and have the kitchen already clean!

 

During opening and closing prayers as well as some of the worship time, he reached out and held my hand. That used to be a very common thing for us to do, but not so much for a long time (many years). It was nice.

 

I was exhausted to the point of going to sleep on the way home from church. I think I was in a very peaceful place as I closed my eyes to just get into the praise song which was playing on the radio. The next thing I knew we were just a few short blocks from the house. Church is about 18 miles away; I probably slept for 5 miles of that distance.

 

Tuesday night we had made plans for what to do after church. That all went by the wayside as we just snuggled, and I went back to sleep in the best place I know.....in passion4one's arms!

 

HSKC's: 20+

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Today started out early but we had a good morning as I got up and off to work. I had a wonderful breakfast and got in a lot of the 20's this morning leaving her in a good place as I left for work. It was a busy day but i still got to text her a  few times.  

 

We started a project today at 3pm and had just gotten a good start when she called with the disturbing news that she had just gotten.  I normally work till 5 and would have worked to 6 with this started normally but I knew the desperation in her voice and let her know that I would be home as soon as I could.

 

Before I would have put work ahead of home but I am slowly changing my life long way of putting work before home.  The other guy I was working with continued to work later after I left, I would never have left someone in the past. When I got back to my office I called to let her know I was close to leaving, and yes I did feel her out on if I stayed to help and even though she told me that it was OK, I knew it wasn't so I left for home anyway.  

 

First thing when I arrived were some kisses and hugs and I told her she looked gorgeous,  that supper smelled good but she smelled better with her perfume on.  

 

I finished setting things for supper and served up the main course.   After supper we immediately started dishes together and have everything washed and dried and put away.  Then I had to crash and take a short nap.  

 

We still need to talk tonight when we can get alone.   ;-)  I love my beautiful wife. 

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Wow Passion4one :!:  :!:  :!:   

 

amazing!  Your doing awesome.  I love that you got in 20 HSKC's before you went to work so that she was floating BEFORE you even left.  Helping with the dishes, etc.

 

Can you see the benefits of Blessing your wife like Christ does for his church, the Bride?  Do you see what we have been trying to get  at all this time?  What we were trying to accomplish?  The Reward on the otherside is great.  That's why Jesus kept his eyes on the prize, his Bride.  He was hoping ( there was not promise given to him) that there would be a Bride on the other side, and BAM there was / is.  

And BAM, there was / is a Bride on the otherside for you as well.  She has always been there, waiting for her Prince charming to show up ....consistently.  

 

Our "children" :) have taken off....in the right direction.

Ya'll and Rainbowbright5 and her husband Fuzzywuzzybear are really in it to win it.  This is great.  ::clap  ::clap  ::clap

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I hadn't replied in about a week.  Did a seminar in Orlando and been busy trying to catch up here at the house.  So much to do with the Marriage Ministry and LegalShield and my Airbnb, which I love doing.  I love doing all of it.  

 

The reward at the end of the day, a Happy wife, and Outrageously Happy Marriage is WORTH it ya'll.

 

On a different topic for a moment.

 

We would like to make a special announcement that Fuzzywuzzybear and Rainbowbright5 are expecting.....

1. to be Outrageously Happy together as husband and wife AND win the Contest. 

2. To set their finances FREE with LegalShield.  

 

 

They just reached their FIRST promotion in LegalShield.  They FAST START QUALIFIED!  

 

Congratulations ya'll!   ::clap  ::clap  ::clap  ::clap  ::clap  ::clap  ::clap  ::clap

 

They are going for the GOLD in their Marriage and in their Finances. 2nd best just doesn't seem  to ya'll.  .  

 

Love it!!!  

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I had told myself that I was not going to go so long between posts as it's hard to get caught up, and it's so long. Well, I waited longer. The internet at home isn't working as it should be. Plus we had a way, way busy extended weekend. In abbreviated form, here goes:

 

Day 13, Thursday: 20+HSKC's.

 

I received very disturbing news from the home front. Passion4one got home as soon as he could after quitting time rather than staying over because of that news.

 

He was very supportive in listening to me unload.

 

Day 14, Friday: 20+HSKC's.

 

He kept in contact with me several times throughout the day. He knew I had a disturbing phone call in the morning. He knew there were other developments throughout the day. I wasn't able to talk at the time, plus he was at work and shouldn't be talking. I just kept telling him that we would talk about it later. OK.

 

I so much wanted him there with me, but I obviously had to wait for him to get off work. Somehow with his checking in with me and knowing that we would talk later, I was able to rest, relax, and enjoy the time I was spending with my siblings and mother.

 

This day while I was taking a shower our 2 youngest children took care of breakfast dishes (daughter had made breakfast) and made our bed!

 

Day 15, Saturday: 20+HSKC's

 

Our scheduled breakfast date was pushed back due to our need of talking with #4 son. We both did some talking, son did a lot of listening and was given many opportunities to talk but didn't say much. What could he say? Well, I thought passion4one did fabulously in talking with him. I think he was out of the room when I said this to son, but I told him that his father is really changing and becoming a very good husband/father. It felt really good to be able to say that from my heart. I had this sense that I was not as the Bible says to do "calling things that are not as though they are", but I was calling what is as it is. Anyway, it felt good inside to say the words.

 

Our date became breakfast at lunch time. It was very nice. It was so good to get away from all the hubbub and turmoil going on and just focus on us. Afterwards, we went to my mother's. She was asleep and everyone else (family in visiting) were gone. While we were waiting for them to return we played a board game. That just doesn't happen very much in my world! Cool!!!! It was fun!

 

Day 16, Sunday: 20+HSKC's

 

He fixed breakfast for us.

 

#5 son came and asked me for help on ironing a shirt! That might not be big to some, but it is giant for me....I was dropping everything I was doing and running to help. I even got a thank you!

 

On the way to and from church, the three youngest were pleasantly playing and bantering back and forth. A lot different from the cloak of silence that has been present for soooooo long now.

 

After church, we all went to my mother's for lunch. We had three different vehicles going. Passion4one and I went in our car. Later in the day, he went home as he had things to get done, and he wanted to fix some pork out on the fire. (supper tonight!!!). He kept in touch with me several times before I got home. #4 son was my escort home after he got off work. The others had gone home after #2 daughter had gotten off work.

 

Day 17, Monday: 20+HSKC's

 

I have the little card that he had placed in my Valentine flowers standing at the corner on our bathroom sink vanity. I saw it and felt myself just start beaming inside. I sent him a text thanking him for putting a smile in my being. (Hmmm....he never acknowledged that text! :oops: )

 

I had not gotten a Valentine card for him. Somewhere I mentioned that I just was not ready to go look for cards for him. This afternoon #4 son, his girlfriend, and I were in Wal-Mart. A display of marked down Valentine's cards caught my attention. It would be kind of hard not to have noticed it as they are really BIG cards (roughly 18x24 inches.....really BIG cards)! I was compelled to go look at them and even pick one out. I questioned myself about being ready to get him a card or not. I figured for $0.30 I couldn't go wrong. I was clowning around with son that I might have to sell a piece of bubblegum to be able to afford it. He questioned if I had one to sell. No, maybe I could find one in the parking lot! Ok, that's gross! I admit it. What I hope you are catching here though is that the spirit of fun and playfulness is springing up in my being.

 

I feel like I am going to say more here about our children than about passion4one, but I think we all know that in talking about the children, I am talking about passion4one.

 

Passion4one did not go to my mother's for supper. There was no need for him to drive the hour there to turn around and come back the hour and ten minutes to our work house. I brought supper to him.

 

When the youngest two and I were saying our goodbyes to leave, #3 son was sitting at the end of the table. I gave him a kiss on the top of his head, a hug around the shoulders, and said, "Goodbye, I love you!" He quietly said, "I love you!" !!!!!!!!!!  That was music to my ears. In telling passion about it, he questioned if it was said for show. I don't think so. It was said low enough that I think I am the only one that heard it, and I heard it only because I was standing so close to him and still bent over towards his head. I would not at all put it past any of our kids to do so for show and have felt that they have done so in the past, but not this time. This, by the way, is the son that has not even been acknowledging our existence.

 

On our way in the car, I'm driving, #5 son in front passenger seat, daughter in back seat. He put his arm down on arm rest, and I felt his elbow bump mine. Ok, I wasn't sure if that was an accident or a playful bump. It happened again. And again. So we started in bumping our arms. Then a few miles down the road, I reached over and tapped him. He immediately got in the game, and we did that for a mile or two. Again, this may not be much to some, but it's huge in my world.

 

Day 18, Tuesday: 20+HSKC's

 

What can I say? There seems to be an ever growing peace that is settling in our home. :razz: :razz: :razz:

 

Passion4one fixed some of his "world famous" pizza for supper (enough leftovers for lunch today!!!!!).

 

I surprised him with his giant Valentine after supper. There were lots of smiles all the way around!!!!

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I think this is the first time I left work due to weather and power went out so what I could do got really limited fast, Murphy's Law , as I got out of my car at our work house the IT guy calls me with a question on an error on one of the UPS systems....power had just came back on....

It has been good being home for so long. She fixed a great supper that everyone complimented. I was ordering some stuff on the computer so I think she feels deserted tonight but then I worked on several problems on here computer and seem to have them resolved.  The 20's have not been as high  as they could have been but the night is not over yet..... ::love  Even had a lot of interaction with our 2 children that are here.  I am working on keeping her happy i am blessed to have a Godly wife like 1Love....

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Just came across another interesting article related to oxytocin titled, To Touch or Not to Touch - The Lost Art of Human Connection.  Keep up the great work all.  I have been able to give my wife kisses nearly daily which is a big improvement for us.  We had a good date night on Sunday seeing Risen which was an OK movie, more historically accurate than biblically accurate.  I hope everyone has a great week.  

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Well, there are two sides to every coin. I feel like this thread is supposed to be about all the oxytocin being poured out and not the cortisol. I don't really want to talk about the cortisol. But I want every guy here to understand the importance of consistently pouring out the oxytocin....especially passion4one. I've been off of here for a week now and am finally able to get on and talk about it. That is the level of hurt that cortisol causes. Here goes:

 

Day 19, Wednesday: We had a fantastic start to the day, but..... I always hate those "but's!" As passion4one already posted, he made it home early from work this day due to weather and power outage. I was really excited about the prospect of being able to spend more time with passion4one. If I get 20+ HSKC's when he works his normal hours, how much more will he be able to pour into me to accelerate us to the other side of this journey? Wishful thinking? High hopes? You got it! At this point, I was flying so high on the oxytocin that he was pouring into me, that there was no limit, in my thinking, to where he could take us.

 

I guess one could say that I set myself up for a big fall with that line of thinking. And a BIG fall it was!

 

After supper, he texted me from another room of the house asking if I was upset with him. I responded with: I don't guess. Just abandoned. I did a smart scan. I don't know what to do with it.

 

He knew I was at my computer, and the scan was on the computer.

 

His response: What did it find

 

I didn't care at all about the computer. I probably should have put that part in a separate text. The big thing I wanted him to pick up on was that I felt abandoned. The one thing that he ignored in my text was that I felt abandoned.

 

I plummeted from my oxytocin high and crashed to the ground. I hit hard.

 

All it would have taken was for him to acknowledge that I was in need of some of those precious 20's and cover me with the 20's or at least text that he would be there soon.

 

This picture just came to me: Kathy telling Joel she needed a hug, and Joel "fighting" the hurricane force winds to get to her to give her what she needed.

 

That's the second time that picture has come up with us. (January: driving through the blowing snow to get to me)

 

The difference: he didn't fight to get to me; he didn't move to get to me; he didn't acknowledge my need at all.

 

So he posted about working on my computer. Yes, he did that. Guess what! I've always felt that the computer was more important to him than I was. I just got socked in the face with that realization again.

 

Guys, the 20's are so important. Don't hold back in the slightest!

 

I didn't keep count of the 20's for that day. I wish I had. I know it wasn't 20. Probably at best 10. More time available should equate to more of the 20's not less!

 

Yes, I hit hard.

 

Yes, at bed time he tried to make up for the lack of talking and the lack of 20's. I was already shut down. It didn't matter.

 

He tried; I wasn't receptive. If that makes be bad, so be it. But I don't see it that way. It's giving good for good and bad for bad. I didn't have good, warm, fuzzy feelings. I couldn't give what I didn't have. I very much wanted to be in that good place, but I couldn't fabricate it.

 

Day 20, Thursday: A new day. Tension is still in the air. I don't want that.

 

Not expecting him to get the text until after work when the kids and I would already be home rather than at the work house (planned cookout), I sent him a text to check the text from the night before and evaluate it.

 

He saw it earlier than I expected and was clueless.

 

When he got home that evening, I could tell that he was not happy about having to make the drive to home. He was already feeling HIS pain of HAVING to drive every day this week (#2 son home on spring break from PA, and I am staying home to spend time with him.) and was complaining about the prospect.

 

He was trying to do the right things. Did I say TRYING? There it is! This is my on the spot revelation. He had left the BEING who he was to go back to TRYING to do! Lord, thank you for shining your light on this!

 

Guys, TRYING doesn't cut it. You have to let this change BE who you are. Out with the old and in with the new. It can't be a mixture of the two.

 

I will give him credit for trying to get the 20's in. I, again, was not overly receptive. I was still hurting. I had to explain about the text. I had to explain about feeling abandoned. I told him the simple little action on his part that would have prevented this entire fiasco.

 

Day 21, Friday: The biggest thing that stands out about this day is that I should have sent him back out of the house to turn around and come back in with a different attitude. I guess I was taken by surprise and wasn't thinking, or I would have done so. I've never done that before, but I hope I have gotten strong enough to be able to come from a place of strength and make it happen.

 

It wasn't good. It wasn't about any of us. It was about his drive home. Again, I told him the simple action he could have taken to have prevented the mess.

 

He TRIED to get the 20's in.

 

Day 22, Saturday: How much more can we take of this? After being in such a good place for as long as we were, this is horrible.

 

But GOD is at work!!!! While we seemed to be struggling (wrestling with the enemy), things were happening with our family.

 

I don't know if this is in a post, or if it was only talked about on a call. Before Easter 2015, #3 son had damaged a flatbed trailer that he co-owns with #2 son. He was not working on repairing it. He would not accept help from passion in repairing it. He would not talk about it. In fact, in July, 2015, he started giving us the silent treatment.

 

When I got home on Friday, he had the trailer parked up by the house and began working on it. On Saturday, passion was able to help him work on it. They spent a few hours together with this project. It's still not completed. It's still parked in my parking spot. But it's progress!

 

We had our date night. He was very agreeable to start our evening with taking a few minutes to go by and check on my mother. We went for pizza and basically had the entire restaurant to ourselves.

 

We talked some, but it's still not back to where we were on Wednesday morning. Oh, how I so want to be back to that place.

 

He tried to get the 20's in.

 

Day 23, Sunday: As the saying goes, another day another dollar. We still have not broken through. Is it that I have to wait for the wound to scab over and heal? I see him trying (there's that word again), but it just isn't getting through. It's like snail pace healing. I don't like it.

 

I guess if I had to pick one word to describe us at this point it would be amicable.

 

Church was fine. I had a text from #2 daughter that she and #3 son were getting stuff for pizza for supper.

 

The afternoon turned out great. When we got home, daughter gave directives for #4 son and #3 daughter to do dishes. No questions asked, no fuss made; they did them. She made apple pies. #3 and #5 sons cut up toppings for pizza and made salad. Passion made his "famous pizza." #1 daughter and her fiancee came over. I didn't have to do anything but sit back and soak it all in (and clean up the mess).

 

The only ones missing were #1 son (in Africa) and #2 son who spent the day with his pastor (and family) between going to morning and evening church about an hour from home.

 

During the afternoon, #3 son brought his TV up from his room in the basement, and we all watched netflix. Our TV does not have internet capabilities. In fact, it's probably older than the internet!

 

#3 son (remember the one that gives the silent treatment) asked me if I wanted to go to SC with him to see my brother on son's vacation. I'm in shock! Our plan is to go next week. Passion will have to be very creative to get the 20's in!

 

The only thing that would have made this day better (besides having other two sons home with us) would be to have been in that good place with passion.

 

Again, he's trying to get the 20's in and do the right thing.

 

Day 24, Monday: More good family time with the children watching netflix.

 

Trying to get the 20's in and do the right thing.

 

Day 25, Tuesday: Older children are not home due to work or meetings. The younger two, passion, and I had supper together, and then children dispersed.

 

20's attempted.

 

We watched a movie together.

 

Day 26, Wednesday: The ladies' call was very good and uplifting today. Maybe I should have called Kathy last Thursday?! 

 

I took #5 son to a meeting in the evening. While he was at his meeting, I went to visit my mother. Passion was on his way home from work. He went by steak n shake and got supper for the two of us and met me at my mother's. She had already eaten before we got there. He stayed for a while then needed to get on home. He had to be out the door by 3:45 this morning.

 

When I got home, we talked a little more.

 

Here's another change with our children. #2 daughter - once before she left for church and once after getting home from there - she snapped at me. I could tell by that that she had not had a good day at work. I wasn't going to push it; just give her space. Before she left for church she said she didn't mean to snap. That's a first! After she had gotten ready for bed after the second incident, she came and knocked on our bedroom door. Again, she said she doesn't mean to snap. In her own way, I would guess she calls that an apology even though "I'm sorry" was not said. I will take it as such. I am just in awe as her snapping has never been followed up with any such expression of remorse!

 

We had a very good night. Things are back in a good place. Praise God!

 

What made the difference???? Time to heal? His continuing to pursue with the HSKC's when I wasn't overly receptive? The ladies' call? I don't know.

 

I do know that since Wednesday afternoon of last week, I have felt that he had gone back to self-focusing. The first thing was a comment about missing work hours due to the plant shutting down, and it just kept spiraling down from there. I give him much credit for continuing to TRY to get it right rather than going off within himself completely.

 

Last night, I felt that I was, once again, his focus.

 

Guys, make sure you focus on your bride.

 

Ladies, make sure you are on the ladies' call.

 

I don't know what specifically brought the change. Maybe it was a combination of many things. The 20's were back on board last night and going strong today. :)

 

 

 

 

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Hi there everyone,

 

This is Kathy, I'm back to replying here on the Contest string.  

 

Hi there Weather fide, welcome to the Contest.  What is your Brides forum name?  

 

Ok everyone,

 

Lets get the contest up and moving MORE!!  Lets hear from everyone!!  How well is everyone doing?  

 

Everyone give me an update!!  

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Wow, not much posting on the contest.  It is going to be a little difficult, actually, VERY difficult to determine a winner if there is not postings.  Maybe everyone got a good running head start and ran out of steam.

 

hmmmmm.  

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Hi Kathy and Joel,

 

Just a quick update, thankfully the warming trend continues for us.  A bit more kisses and longer hugs.  We had a nice date out this weekend thanks in part to friends from church watching the kids.  I continue to find little ways I can bless my wife such as making juice in the morning and giving little massages.  We actually got to sit on the couch yesterday and she laid her legs across mine.  It was nice to smile back and forth with each other.  I am so thankful we have come thus far.  Praise be to God.  I love my wife.

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Day 27, Thursday: This was a very good day. It was the last with any calmness to it until yesterday.

 

The 20's were in good form.

 

I think we went to sleep snuggled up together after watching a show on Netflix...a big surprise that our internet would allow that.

 

I am so glad we had our time together to just relax and build up the oxytocin. It's what helped me make it through the next few days.

 

Day 28, Friday: This started out like any normal day. Well, maybe not. I think this was the morning I woke up and asked passion if he had to go to work. He had about 15 minutes to be out the door. Let's just say it was a good thing that his breakfast and lunch were already boxed and ready to go. He made it to work on time.

 

Even with very little time he was able to get me a good start on my day with a few HSKC's.

 

Did I say Friday already? Wow! Here's a big difference from the week before: Remember we came home on Thursday the week before which brought up complaints from passion4one about having to make the drive on Friday. So here it is the next Friday, he's made the drive every day, and he's not complained even one time that I remember!

 

Wow! Thank you passion4one! That makes things so much easier.

 

We had a major development come up today which changed what our Saturday was going to look like.

 

Knowing that I was still at my mother's when he was on his way home from work, passion called to see if I wanted to go out to eat. As it turned out, we took #2 son who was in town with me and #2 daughter who was staying the night with my mother (so my mother wouldn't have to stay alone) with us. We had a really good time.

 

Upon leaving, son took my car taking our daughter back to my mother's and then home. We went together making a quick stop at the grocery store on the way home. This gave us some private talk time.

 

HSKC's were good for the day.

 

Day 29, Saturday: This is to be a crazy busy day. #5 son had a pinewood derby race about an hour and a half away from home. This has got to be the first time that passion and I have only taken one child to this event. So the three of us had a good time together. Son got second place in his class! It was good to see our friends that we usually only see a couple of times a year.

 

Before the race started, #4 son had called to tell me one of our two horses was down and wouldn't get up. The children at home were able to take care of everything. All I did was instruct them to call the vet. What else could I do? With the description I had been given, it didn't sound good. It turned out to be colic, and they had to keep the horse up and moving. He got up on his own as soon as the vet got there and started walking towards him and talking to him...and they had never met before!

 

#2 daughter called into work and said she wouldn't be there. The children worked together taking turns walking him around. When we got home, they had about a half hour to go to make the four hours of walking that they had been instructed to do. About five minutes after letting him go, he was back down. They got him back up and went for another four hours. They all worked together taking turns. A fire was built for warmth as it was getting cold since it was now dark. It was so good to see the unselfish cooperation. It was a job that needed done and it was done. Period. The horse is fine now.

 

In the past passion would have had something to say about the cost of calling the vet out...especially on the weekend. He never said a word!

 

I mention it here for the purpose of showing how our children are changing as this contest is progressing. Passion is changing our whole little world, and it is great!

 

We got home and immediately went to work on a pizza party which had been requested on Friday for Saturday night around 8.

 

Do you remember what I said in my last post about our pizza party on Sunday? What was missing?

 

Friday mid-morning I had gotten a text from our son in Africa. He was going to be home Saturday night and requested pizza for supper! What?!!! We did not expect to see him until December of 2017! I will not go into the details here.

 

I had told passion, #2 son, and #2 daughter that he was coming in. We managed to keep it a surprise for the rest of the family. I tried my best to get #1 daughter there for supper, but that wasn't enough. She did come after I sent a selfie of son and me in my kitchen. She said she would have been there if I had told her why I needed her there. Her loss! I had told her I needed her there for a good surprise. #4 son was working and got home about ten minutes after daughter got there.

 

So Saturday night my picture was complete for a little while with my whole family in the same room once again! It was short-lived as son and his friend who had picked him up from the airport left to go back to the city where son had gone to college. We will see him soon though.

 

HSKC's: 20+ Passion has kept them flowing all throughout the day.

 

We went to bed exhausted and in a very peaceful place.

 

Day 30, Sunday: Another very busy day with a lot to be done to be ready for my trip to SC.

 

HSKC's: 20+ They were there just about every time I turned around. Passion fixed breakfast for us.

 

Unfortunately we didn't get the alone time that we both wanted, but we spent much needed time with our children.

 

Day 31, Monday: Passion got many HSKC's in before he left for work.

 

#3 son, #3 daughter, and I left for SC at the same time that #2 son left to go back to school in PA. We all had good trips arriving at our destinations safely.

 

Passion had contact with me many times throughout our journey via phone and text.

 

Day 32, Tuesday: Again many of the HSKC's via phone and text. He even sent a picture of the made bed before he went to work! That's brownie points right there.

 

Somewhere I missed telling about the five beautiful red roses that passion had brought home for me last week. I think it was on Monday. I left them at home on my dining table for my daughter to enjoy this week.

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Ok I checked the picture I sent her of the made bed so I will guess she saw the big red card, that she got for me, that I put on my pillow, and thought it was the pillow, but my red pillow is at the other house...... :razz:

 

With her gone on this trip I had mentioned that it would be harder to get the 20's in and she said i would have to get creative.  Ok, so on the men's call last night I mentioned I was thinking of sending her flowers and they all said don't think about it do it.  

 

So after looking at the available flower shops and the delivery charge I knew they pass by shop sometime if not almost every day.  So I checked with my sister in law if she would be able to pull off my surprise off.  Then called the flower shop and ordered the bouquet and worked out a plan to have her ask my sister in law  about this name and have it be 1love to surprise her, and to double the surprise after she got the bouquet then I got a plant for my sister in-law as a surprise  for her for helping with my setup.  Then I called sister in-law and told her the set up or part of it anyway.  

 

So later that day she takes 1love  by this floral shop to look at their gift shop and so the plan unfolded from there, first 1love was surprised then the sister in law.  The report I got is that 1loves face turned red. :wub: .......I got her. ::clap  ::love

 

So I had a good day with succeeding at my plan.  I assume she will report on here too. 

 

I have been with techs the last 2 days at work but managed to get in several text and phone calls.  ::love

 

I will be looking forward to them getting home but I think their schedule for this trip will be too late Sunday for a date.  :cry: but we can still snuggle........ :wub:

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Day 33, Wednesday: Yes, I did notice the Valentine card on the bed. I thought that very special, too.

 

I was going to get on here to tell about the surprise of the flowers today and post a picture. I was trying to do this on my ipad, and then it was time to go to church so I closed it out. It didn't save it. I couldn't see how to add a picture, so I'll have to check that out. I'm on my computer now.

 

I was thoroughly surprised to say the least with the flowers. After leaving the flower shop, we went to a restaurant. We couldn't leave our flowers in the truck to get too hot, so we took them in with us.

 

There were some people standing outside, and one of the gentlemen said something about the flowers. My sil had gone in first carrying her plant, and he had commented on it. Then he saw my bouquet, and questioned about all the flowers. I said that they were from my husband in Illinois. He said something about a man that gets you flowers must really love you and is a keeper. I had to wholeheartedly agree.

 

Then as we were heading to our table, the server asked if the flowers were for a birthday. I said, "No. They're a 'just because', just because my husband loves me!"

 

HSKC's as well as they can be with about 1,000 miles separating us.

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Not a lot going on here when 1love got home late Sunday evening we were both exhausted by the time we got to bed which was well after when I should have been there.  I was sidetracked on a computer that crashed trying to fix it for the children and was trying a fix when she came in the first time and didnt notice her.

 

 I knew they had gotten in but no one had came in yet so after missing her I went out to find her but the damage was already done. We talked about it that night but didn't get it completely resolved.  

 

We were both still exhausted Monday so I did not stay at our work home but went back home.  I had finally pulled over at a rest area, which I needed to take a break long before that, for a few minutes rest.  She was actually at her mothers so when I walked in along with 1love and her mother was her brother and wife along with our oldest son.  So somewhere in greeting everyone I missed 1love why I have no Idea.  So another bad for me, I got home before her and when I kissed her as she came in i questioned in my mind if I had kissed her hello at her mothers but didn't say anything at the time.   It seems since she got back I have been on a roll but the wrong one for sure.  

 

Pretty aggravated with myself for missing so many things. I think we are finally both rested up so tonight has been better but I still feel like I am not where I should be............puzzled with this feeling.   :wacko:

 

I love my beautiful bride though and have let her know that every chance i get. :wub:

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  • 2 weeks later...

We have been back on track this week it has been a long short week......LOL  working long hours at work and it is a short week, but very busy for me.  I am doing pretty good with the 20's I think and trying to make sure I don't come home too tired to do anything although a time or 2 I have taken short power naps to refresh.  I am keeping the love of my life happy and loving doing it.  

 

 I surprised her with flowers  :wub:  ::love last Friday night after we got home and had unloaded the cars of luggage and groceries. 

 

Still trying to figure out what our weekend will include we seem to always be over scheduled with things that we cant really not do on weekends......

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Had another great evening last night watched a movie together and since I didn't have to work today we got to actually sleep in.  Lots of 20's last night and today so far.   :eyes:  ::love

 

We will be starting and adventure that she wanted to do next week as we are signed up for a  ballroom dancing class that she has been pushing me to do for quite a while.  We had discussed it earlier this year but we missed the start date. :unsure:  :rolleyes:

 

We have had some good family interaction and 2 of our children invited us to the Good Friday service at their church so we are going to take them up on that and enjoy spending a night of worship with them. Although one son is working in the fields with a farm service so he is not sure he will get off in time to make it.

 

Where is everyone else that is in the contest.......................

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NICE WORK Passion4one. ::clap   Really, you have kept it up well, may this continue as a lifelong pursuit!!  Thankfully things are steady at our home front as well.  We are not at 20 HSKC but working toward it each day.  The good news is my wife is interacting with me overall and I thank God I get to love her everyday.   :razz:

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I will try to make this as short and as painless as possible. I can't even reconstruct in my mind the different days.

 

Days 34-37 finished out our trip to SC. I had a great time and so missed my wonderful husband. He kept showering me with texts and calls letting me know how much he loved me and missed me.

 

As I was driving home, I had one focused thought: to be held in passion's arms. I very much missed my husband (children too!) and being in his arms.

 

My greeting home left a lot to be desired but could have easily been fixed. Unfortunately this turned into a long ordeal of giving excuses instead of a simple apology. Self-focus 101!

 

Days 38-44 were more days of trying to push through to get back to a happy place.

 

He kept trying to get the 20's in through all of these days. Again, we are at the TRYING stage instead of the 20's coming out of the new man. It just isn't the same. It is a discernible difference.

 

Days 45-49 once again showed promise. Day 45 brought an apology to me and to Kathy. That helped. It was apology without excuse. That apology that says I am sorry that what I did hurt you, not an apology that said "I was just......"

 

The apology without excuse is the one that heals the hurt.

 

The excuses add to the hurt. The excuses just say that "you have no right to be hurt because what I was doing was an okay thing to do." The excuse says, "What I was doing is more important than how you feel."

 

Day 50, Saturday: This was a rough day....taxes! It turned out to be a very self-focused day for passion while I was doing our taxes and two of our sons' taxes. Passion had his own projects going on. I really don't know what happened.

 

Day 51, Sunday: This was a very good day. HSKCs were in good form.

 

Day 52, Monday: This day started out good but did not end well.

 

I have spent too much time this afternoon going through all of my posts here evaluating each day with a smiley, frowny, or straight line face on a single sheet of notebook paper. It's kind of interesting and a bit encouraging. I'm happy to report that there are definitely more smiley faces than the combined of the other...2:1.

 

I know I just want to get back to the swimming in oxytocin feeling which I have been missing.

 

I don't like roller coasters!

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