Mary Jane I have followed your no smoking issue with some interest. I have been praying about this since you posted a few weeks back and hope it will be all right if I share a few thoughts. A question I have about this is do you think this is from God this issue of stop smoking or is this from man? I wonder based on your statement “There are three main changes "I" need you to make, though. Quit smoking completely and for ever.” If this is not of God than I really question how successful this endeavor will be.
I am an ex-smoker so hopefully I can speak with at least a little authority. It is a very addicting habit to say the least. Many try to quit, failing once or twice if they are every lucky enough to actually quit. I quit for about 3 years and then started again, smoked for about another year and then quit and it has been 20 years or so now. Not saying I could not start smoking again, I could in a heartbeat. Be prepared for changes in your husband that you cannot even begin to imagine. Nothing may happen just saying that it can. I can show you one person who really tried and became such a bi**h that the family and coworkers ask that they start smoking again. The personality changes were that bad. Many people will gain a lot of weight, I did. I can take you to the grave of one who never was able to kick the habit. The last time I saw the person they were smoking through the hole in their throat. One would assume that the Doctors and family told this person they needed to quit, however it would appear that even the threat of death was not enough to make them change.
You say his smoking interferes with your relationship. I may be out of place, but was he smoking before you were married? If so and you were convicted that smoking would interfere with your relationship why did you marry this person? Kind of like one spouse being a vegetarian and the other not. After marriage then it becomes a BEEF (pun intended) and the non-vegetarian needs to eat no more beef. Excuse me but my God put beef on this earth for me to eat thank you very much! And this personally happened to me. I was unable to help in the reproduction process and my spouse knew this going into marriage as I was up front with them with what the problem was. However once we married then it became a huge issue. So what does one do with that? Now if we are talking about issues that are sin, such as porn that one did not know about ahead of time then that is a completely different issue. There you certainly have the right and should say it stops and stops now or there is the door.
Personally going into marriage some of the things I looked at in my spouse was a non-smoker and one without tattoos. Those 2 issues were deal breakers for me. For the next person they would not be a problem at all.
Mary Jane if God is directing you to do this than by all means proceed. One could assume that He is directing your husband to quit too. This will certainly be a challenge and he will need all the support that God, family, and friends can give. At least I did and even years latter that support is still helpful.
